Two years!?!?

I sit here this morning in a&e contemplating the second anniversary of the children moving in. I remember that first night vividly. Lying awake between these three little strangers my body began to itch all over. A huge physical response to this giant undertaking.

Two years…. I cannot remember what life was like before them. We were wondering the other day what we did before the kids arrived. In the grand scheme of things not a fat lot. We did holiday excessively so we were kind of prepared for the extra costs!!

Our lives have been turned upside down and inside out. The things that happen in our lives are truly surreal and bizarre most days but we have accepted them as perfectly ordinary. We have dealt with post traumatic stress (not just ours), health, bad behaviour, losing them, finding them, inappropriate comments, embarrassing public moments, laughter, joy and, most importantly, hugs and kisses!

In two short years we have seen Elsa leave behind her sadness and become the giggly, silly, huggable bundle of joy. Anna has left behind her regular tantrums in favour of occasional reruns. She is never short of hugs and kisses and she will forever be a worry but she is safe and adored. Kristoff is almost out of nappies – nights are a struggle! He has become an intelligent, inquisitive boy who learns fast and doesn’t let you forget.

Husband and I are older (quite significantly) and wiser but still on a massive learning curve every single day. They are the best thing we ever did and whilst I confess I have wept on the stairs more times than I can remember, l wouldn’t change one moment, one tantrum, one ounce of vomit for anything. Even if you could turn the clock back and make me fertile I would not change this.

I sit in a&e waiting to find out if Kristoff’s beloved 5p is in his stomach or his chest remembering how many times I’ve told him not to put things in his mouth; acknowledging that I’m always going to worry about all of them; feeling overwhelmingly in love with all three of them. It is easy to forget sometimes, particularly when you’ve been in a&e for 4 hours, but life is Good!